My purpose
in talking/writing about sex is to help demystify the whole negative mindset
surrounding sex. I want you to become more comfortable with yourself and your
sexuality. I want you to not only be
able to talk about it but to actually enjoy it, preferably with someone else
who will mutually enjoy it with you.
But before
we can improve something, we need to assess our current situation.
As a Life
Coach, that’s what I do. I ask people to
share with me: (1)what they want, (2)what isn’t working in their lives, (3)what
it is costing them to stay stuck in this situation and (4)what their lives
would look like if things could change.
So here we
go.
Take the
time to answer these two questions. Don’t
rush through them. Get a pencil right
now. I mean it. Go get a pencil and
allow some time to honestly reflect on these questions and then actually write
down your answers. Don’t tell me you can
answer them in your head. Write your
answers down! If you don’t, I will hunt you down and make you wish you had.
Seriously. This is something you need to
do, so take my advice and do it!
(1) Describe
where you are with your sex life right now. Do you hate it? Do you not have
enough time for it? Do you want more of it? Are you totally repulsed by it? Are
you mad that your significant other or someone else suggested you read it? This is your time to be honest. You aren’t
going to hurt my feelings, so write it down.
(2)What is your first association with sex? How old were you? What was happening? Who was involved? Try to
write down as many of the sensual feelings you were experiencing (think 5
senses: smell, taste, sight, sound and smell) as well as the emotional feelings
surrounding it (fear, shock, excitement). Some of you may have stumbled across
your Father’s Playboys. Or you caught
someone in the act. How did you feel?
Take the time to write down all of the feelings/emotions/reactions/etc.
Believe it or not, so many of our current belief systems/mindsets/behaviors
stem back to childhood. If you are like
me, and were brought up to believe that sex was something that was “naughty” or
only to be used in the context of marriage, you may still be operating within
that mindset. Sex is NOT naughty. It is a beautiful gift God gave two
consenting adults who care for each other and want to experience a type of
intimacy that can only happen through the combining of their bodies and souls.
I know that sex is not the most comfortable subject to talk
about, yet it can be one of the most pleasurable ways of drawing two human
beings together.
My hope is that by me talking about sex the following will
happen: (1) more people will feel comfortable talking about it and it will
become less of a taboo subject, (2) it will help educate those who don’t know
much about the topic, (3) it will improve relationships which are struggling,
(4) it will prevent some individuals from having to go through the pain of
affairs and (5) more couples will experience mutually enjoyable relationships
which includes satisfying and pleasurable sex.
Stacy Rothenberger, M.S. CCC-SLP
Certified Mindset and Relationship Life Coach
Communication Disorders Expert
Keynote Speaker
You have such an interesting blog. Thanks for sharing. Reading blogs is my hobby and I randomly found your blog. I enjoyed reading your posts. All the best for your future blogging journey. Please keep in touch with me in Twitter, @ipersuade.
ReplyDelete